{"id":2308,"date":"2014-06-09T18:35:56","date_gmt":"2014-06-09T18:35:56","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.wabash.edu\/fyi\/?p=2308"},"modified":"2014-10-21T16:15:50","modified_gmt":"2014-10-21T16:15:50","slug":"a-lovehate-take-on-big-bash","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blog.wabash.edu\/fyi\/2014\/06\/09\/a-lovehate-take-on-big-bash\/","title":{"rendered":"A Love\/Hate Take on Big Bash"},"content":{"rendered":"

Steve Charles<\/em>\u2014I didn\u2019t know what to say.<\/p>\n

Chet Turnbeaugh \u201914<\/strong> had shown up at the Class of 1964 Reunion in Littel Lobby to give President Hess a poster he\u2019d made as a thank-you gift, and the new grad had been mingling with guys coming back after 50 years in the world. Now he was leaving Wabash for that world, we were shaking hands goodbye, and I\u2014who had watched Chet\u2019s transformation from awkward freshman to bold, thoughtful, and creative graduate\u2014couldn\u2019t think of what to say.<\/p>\n

\"Chet<\/a>
Chet Turnbeaugh \u201914<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Chet is a talented and caring young man who has taken big risks. He may accomplish a lot in the world. For his sake and the world’s, I hope he does. But he\u2019s a good Wabash man whether he does or not. He\u2019s going into the arts, a tough and often thankless way to make a living. I wanted to offer good words, a way to thank him for what\u2019s he has come to mean to us. And he seemed to be waiting for something wise.<\/p>\n

But all I could manage was a nod and a goofy smile. <\/i>I\u2019ve struggled in similar ways saying goodbye to my sons. \u201cStay in touch,\u201d I told Chet. Oh, how original! How moving!<\/em> I just don\u2019t do goodbyes very well.<\/p>\n

As Chet walked away from Wabash I waved\u2014upping the awkwardness quotient\u2014then turned around to my work of photographing the 70-plus-year-old men who had come home.<\/p>\n

I have a love\/hate relationship with the Big Bash Weekend.<\/p>\n

I love meeting alumni, hearing their stories at Scarlet Yarns and colloquia. I revel in welcoming back friends; I love catching up and seeing how we\u2019ve changed, how quickly our friendships are renewed.<\/p>\n

I love Big Bash one-on-one.<\/p>\n

But I hate the crowds.\u00a0I feel a practically pathological anxiety in gatherings of three or more. I deal with that anxiety by doing my job as a photographer. I shoot most of the big events through 85mm or 135mm telephoto lenses, breaking the\u00a0 \u201cmob\u201d down one person at a time. Then I can see my friends again.<\/p>\n

And I publish those images to encourage other crowd-anxious souls, hoping they\u2019ll overcome their concerns and attend reunions. Taking this work-like approach in the midst of friends has its consequences. I often block the very connections that make Wabash Wabash. A wall against the very story I\u2019m trying to tell.<\/p>\n

On Saturday, seven Wabash guys and a professor tore that wall to pieces.<\/p>\n

I saw Andy Dreitcer \u201979<\/strong> in Lilly Library and called out to him. I had covered Andy\u2019s work on reconciliation for the College\u2019s Pastoral Leadership Program, and we had reprinted a heartbreaking and illuminating personal essay of his in the magazine. I yammered at Andy for so long Saturday he almost missed Alumni Chapel Sing.<\/p>\n

At Chapel Sing Kent Merrill \u201964<\/strong> caught up with me as I was taking photographs. I had enjoyed Kent and Midge\u2019s hospitality years ago during a visit to their home outside of Knoxville, TN, where I\u2019d photographed the beautiful furniture the retired doc had made. I\u2019d had a blast taking pictures in his shop. As Jim Durham \u201964 would say later that night of his longtime friend, \u201cKent\u2019s been a person of compassion and integrity since I first got to know him in the 6th<\/sup> grade.\u201d Kent\u2019s stopping me there at Alumni Chapel Sing made me feel remembered and I held on to that sense of belonging throughout that big event.<\/p>\n

Last spring we shot a video on campus with Jeremy Robinson \u201904<\/strong> about his former student Francisco Huerta \u201914<\/strong>. We\u2019d told other stories about Jeremy\u2019s teaching, but this one brought it all full circle. I felt the pride Jeremy’s Wabash teachers would have felt if they\u2019d been there with us, so I gave him a hug afterward, told him how proud we were of him. A bold thing to do, given I wasn\u2019t a professor. But if Bill Placher or Dan Rogers had been there, I\u2019m confident they would have done the same\u2014I did it for them. Jeremy was back again for Big Bash Saturday and returned the favor on his way to present a colloquium session on teaching, a kind gesture in the middle of a long day that reminded me why I love this place and that I belong here.<\/p>\n

At the Psychology Reception, Visiting Professor Teresa Aubele-Futch<\/strong> and I were talking about one of her students and co-researchers, Brad Wise \u201914, who hopes to attend graduate school in 2015. Although the professor will be teaching at St. Mary\u2019s College next year, she\u2019s taking Wise to a conference next fall to co-present their research and make grad school connections. \u201cBut you won\u2019t be a Wabash professor then,\u201d I said. \u201cI believe in him,\u201d she told me.<\/p>\n

Rev. John Sowers \u201999<\/strong> was a compact force of nature when he was a student but our exchanges then were mostly light-hearted. Saturday for our Scarlet Yarns audio project he talked about how his friend and mentor Coach Max Servies \u201958 had also been a surrogate grandfather to him. Then John’s classmate and fellow preacher and pastor Josh Patty<\/strong> talked about the ongoing relationship he has with the late Professor Bill Placher \u201971\u00a0<\/strong>through Bill\u2019s books and I had to wipe the tears off my viewfinder. I reminded Josh about the time he had listened to me bemoaning the rambling nature of my talk to group of Wabash alumni in Pittsburgh after I\u2019d decided to ditch my script and go \u201coff the cuff.\u201d He had told me then that our presence is the gift we give each other, and often the script gets in the way. He said I didn\u2019t have to be perfect, just had to show up and be genuine.<\/p>\n

\"Jesus<\/a>
Jesus Campos \u201904 shares his story for the College’s Scarlet Yarns audio project.<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

Then Jesus Campos \u201904<\/strong> showed up at the Scarlet Yarns table. Jesus was my son\u2019s pledge brother, we\u2019d had him over for Thanksgiving when he was a student, and he had struggled mightily with the English language and Wabash academics when he arrived here from Texas. Talk about overcoming the odds! On Saturday he expressed his gratitude to Wabash and the many people who had taught and supported him here. It was joy to hear him speak, and fun, too, as we reminisced about his pledge class\u2019s antics. I’ve rarely felt better about being a part of this College community.<\/p>\n

Jesus is helping others now as a social worker in Philadelphia. He said some of his Wabash classmates don’t feel as though they deserve to come back for their reunions. They’re not successful or rich enough to give back the way they want to or feel they should. They think they haven\u2019t done enough in their lives to be worthy of being embraced by their teachers and their classmates. Jesus and I talked about ways to help them see that\u2019s not the point of a reunion: You don\u2019t come home because you have money to build another room on the house; you come home to be with your family.<\/p>\n

I got so caught up in the conversation as we walked out of Lilly Library that I forgot my camera and barely made it in time the cover the Class of 64 50th<\/sup> Reunion Dinner. There Steve Cougill \u201964<\/strong> was the final speaker during an evening of stories. He had attended Wabash for six semesters but hadn\u2019t felt like he really was part of the class, didn\u2019t \u201cdeserve\u201d to join them at their reunion. His Kappa Sig pledge brothers and all his classmates were happy to see him.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s just been wonderful being back with you guys again,\u201d Cougill told his classmates. \u201cAt the Chapel Sing today we were singing \u201cOld Wabash\u201d and I could hardly keep singing because I was getting choked up, just being back with you again. It\u2019s been a great experience, and I hope you guys all come back for our 55th<\/sup>.\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

So now I know what to say to Chet Turnbeaugh: \u201cCome back.\u201d<\/p>\n

“No matter what befalls you, think about your friends and the teachers who believed in you and come back.<\/p>\n

“Don\u2019t wait until you think you have achieved or earned ‘enough’ to come back.\u00a0We knew you when you were dreaming and struggling, singing out of tune the world\u2019s longest fight song, and those friends and family embraced you then. How much more so now?<\/p>\n

“Whether you\u2019ve ‘made it’ or you\u2019re down on your luck, come home. Whether you graduated from Wabash or left after a semester, if this place has meaning to you, come home.<\/p>\n

“Don\u2019t wait until you\u2019ve got hundreds or thousands or millions of dollars to give to your alma mater. As my friend the Rev. Josh Patty \u201999 might say, ‘The present you bring is your presence.'”<\/p>\n

If Wabash teaches us nothing else, she teaches us that.\u00a0And she reminded me over and over again at this year\u2019s Big Bash.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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